Twilight

So, here's what happened... I saw Twilight opening weekend. And I didn't write anything about it here because when I first saw it, I couldn't say anything more than "okay." Do you know how hard it is to write a review about something about which you are completely indifferent?

The thing is...That movie is like some kind of slow-acting narcotic. Leaving the theater and for the rest of the day, into the next, indifference was all I could muster. But as I grew closer to the next weekend, I started considering paying the seven dollars and fifty cents to see it again. As I grew closer to the next weekend I began to be sucked into the whole Twilight insanity. And somewhere in all of that I had forgotten that my initial indifference had kept me from reviewing.

I am poor so I have not returned to the cinema to re-experience the Twilight excitement but I assure you, I will be renting, if not buying, it when it is available on DVD.

That out of the way, as if you couldn't tell that I think you should see it if you haven't already, let's talk a little about the film. Bella Swan (Kristen Stewart) moves from Arizona to Washington to live with her father while her mother is touring the country with her shiny new, semi-pro baseball player husband. The Cullen family is the somewhat eccentric town royalty, headed by Dr. Carlisle Cullen (Peter Facinelli) and surrounded by rumor.

Edward Cullen (Robert Pattinson) is the only of the Cullen's "foster" children who is not romantically involved and because of (or possibly in spite of) that, he is the most sought after and most untouchable "boy" in school, until Bella comes to town.

Classic plot for a teen romance, right? Except that Edward (and his "parents" and brothers and sisters) is a vampire. But you knew that. He is a vegetarian vampire... Okay, now things are getting a little odd. To the Cullens, being a "vegetarian" really means only feeding on animals, not humans

Basically, if you were ever a fan of "Buffy the Vampire Slayer" and the Buffy-Angel romance, you will enjoy Twilight. If you enjoyed Robert Pattinson's *ahem* performance in Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire, you will enjoy Twilight. If you first found vampires with George Clooney and Quentin Tarantino in Mexico...you may have issues with the fuzzy cuddly Cullens. But wait until it is released on DVD and see it anyway. I don't want you getting all pissy with me for sending you to the theater if you find it's not your thing.

Rental Recommendation - Pathology

Pathology, starring Milo Ventimiglia (Heroes), Michael Weston (Cherry Falls), and Johnny Whitworth (Empire Records), was repeatedly pushed from theatrical release over the course of two years, for reasons unclear to this writer. It was finally released to DVD in September of 2008, which is why this is a rental recommendation rather than a standard review.

The premise: A group of forensic pathology residents devise a game to see who can commit the perfect murder. Enter golden boy prodigy, home from Doctors Without Borders-style jaunt to Africa, Ted Grey (Ventimiglia). In the beginning he seems to be wholesome and straight-laced, engaged to marry the aspiring lawyer daughter of a giant in the medical field (Alyssa Milano). But we soon find out there is a dark side to Dr. Grey and he is recruited to join the game.

What is spooky here is that I, as a budding horror writer in my own right, came up with this idea all on my own, probably around the same time casting was being done for this film. But that's beside the point. The point is that, while that and my adoration for the work of Mr. Ventimiglia (not to mention his brooding hazel eyes and washboard stomach *ahem* Hey, I'm not being paid to write this, I can say whatever I want)...

While my strange connection to the storyline and adoration for Mr. Ventimiglia's work may have created a bias, I definitely recommend this film. It is admittedly clear about halfway into the story which player of the game is going to be its undoing however that doesn't take away from the fun of a good old fashioned horror thriller. No shoddy computer animation or 8mm camera work in this one, nosiree. Just good clean fun.

I don't know what kept this out of the theaters for two years, but let's prove the production studio wrong and rent or buy every copy we can find, whaddyasay?